The Split-Personality People Who Populate Our Lives: Understanding the Importance of Serving Only One Master

THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL
by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Source: Mama Lisa’s World – https://www.mamalisa.com/?t=es&p=1365

There was a little girl,
And she had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good
She was very, very good,
And when she was bad she was horrid.

One day she went upstairs,
When her parents, unawares,
In the kitchen were occupied with meals,
And she stood upon her head
In her little trundle-bed,
And then began hooraying with her heels.
Her mother heard the noise,
And she thought it was the boys
A-playing at a combat in the attic;
But when she climbed the stair,
And found Jemima there,
She took and she did spank her most emphatic.

*****

Taken from “Mama Lisa’s World”

– Sandi and Larry sent me a 2nd verse to the version at the top of the page:

Then one day that little girl
Brushed away that little curl
Away from the middle of her forehead
Now she is good
She is very, very good
And nobody thinks she is horrid!

*****

There was a little girl who was either very, very good or downright horrid.

THE STORY OF TWO WOLVES

by RefreshMH | Feb 24, 2016 | UB therapist article

By UB’s Alyssa Yeo, LPC, CYT

Source: https://www.urbanbalance.com/the-story-of-two-wolves/#:~:text=By%20exercising%20your%20freedom%20of,is%20also%20your%20inner%20critic.

While in yoga class the other day, my teacher shared this Native American parable:

An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight, and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”

He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Excerpt:

Whether or not it’s your first time hearing this story, it serves as an important reminder of the power we have over our experiences and emotions.

By exercising your freedom of choice, you can make a life-changing decision of which wolf you want to feed. Do you feed the wolf who is hungry for anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego? This evil wolf is also your inner critic. The one who tells you that you are a failure, the one who says that no one will love you or understand you for who you are. This wolf is a representation of your depression, your anxiety, and your low self-esteem. Do you want to feed this wolf? Are you feeding him already?

By cutting off his food supply, you will be making a choice to use your energy and resources on thoughts, feeling, and emotions that serve you in healthy ways. While you can recognize the negative emotions occurring within you, you don’t have to attach to them or continue to give them attention. You shifting your focus is a sign to that wolf that you are not interested in giving him food. And while it may take some time for that wolf to lose his strength and power, eventually he will surrender – as will your unhelpful thoughts and emotions. Once you stop fixating on them, they will eventually drift away.

So, what about the other wolf? Well, it certainly isn’t going to feed itself.

Just as you would with the bad wolf, it is imperative that you exercise your freedom of choice and decide to nourish the wolf of joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. We often look to external objects for our fulfilment and happiness. We develop expectations that these things (a new job, a relationship, a lavish vacation, a brand-new pair of shoes, a glass of wine, etc.) will finally make us feel the way we want to feel. And while this may bring momentary gratification, it isn’t realistic to maintain this long-term.

Happiness isn’t a conditional state. It’s a state of being. True lasting happiness comes from making an active choice to be happy, rather than depending on external things to make you happy. The more that we seek out happiness and look for it as if it is a treasure we will find, the less we are feeding the wolf that is inside of us. You already have everything you need to be happy because you are whole as you are, right now. The feeling and experience of happiness comes from feeding the wolf from within. As he becomes bigger and stronger, he will be better equipped to handle life’s challenges. If you choose to feed only him, he will always win.

There is a constant battle between the two wolves who live within us. See how the image looks like a « split-personality » – two, very different faces of the same person.

For a better perspective on this subject, please read one of my earlier blogs explaining the same issue differently. It is called, ‘Silent Wolves; Howling Moon.”

Click the link here to read the entire blog: https://hookedoninspiration.org/2013/02/09/silent-wolves-howling-moon/

The sound of wolves howling at night can be quite eerie but this howling is not necessarily at the moon. It’s their way of communication – a social call to rally, a hail to hunt or as a territorial expression.

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This author would now like to share with you all a brand-new insight into this matter:

When I speak of a ‘split-personality’ or a ‘multi-faceted personality’, it is truly in the literal sense of the words. Haven’t we all come across people like that? Such people have a certain recognizable and an obvious, appreciable goodness in them but unfortunately, most of the time, we only see the negativity of their character – mean-mindedness, manipulative behaviour, deviousness, etc. The list is endless. Why should this be the case, we often wonder? We are often left wondering why that same person who can be so kind, empathetic, considerate and caring, suddenly shows the dark side of their personality, by being distinctly horrid and downright hurtful and obnoxious towards us? And that too often. Simply put, none of us are perfect or saintly, for sure, but it is our very own CHOICES and DISCIPLINED DECISIONS that define us. It all boils down to which “wolf” you choose to feed, at any given point of time.

The trick is in understanding the perfect balance of the way in which the ‘good wolf’ and the ‘evil wolf’ need to be fed. The Good Wolf embodies all the sterling qualities of goodness and benevolence – love, care, kindness, thoughtfulness, sincerity, honesty, integrity, morality, etc. The Wicked Wolf embodies all that is negative – anger, hatred, cruelty, bitterness, meanness, etc. Of course, the list just goes on and on.

You must understand that both wolves need to be fed. But the Good one more than the other. Use all the excellent qualities of the Good Wolf to become – and remain being – a better person than who you already are. Learn the art of being kind and forgiving – forgiveness is for self-healing and if you must forgive, then do it generously and unconditionally. Forgive but never forget – that is my sincere advice to you. The same mistakes of the past ought not to be repeated, again and again – then, they are no longer mistakes, they become conscious choices and these decisions define you as the person that you are already and will become.

Choose wisely. If you keep the Evil one starving, you will create a monster within yourself, and a stage will be reached where there will be no turning back from it. The Point of No Return. We imagine monsters looking like the Devil Incarnate with horns on his head, but it is critical to understand that the Face of Evil is really very human. Human beings will always be their own worst enemies. Feed the Wicked Wolf just enough to keep him subdued. It’s like saying – let sleeping dogs lie. Do not awaken him, aggravate, or provoke this Wolf unnecessarily – learn to understand the limit. Use the Wicked Wolf when the choice of using your rage and anger becomes important – when you need to fight against the many evils, injustices, heinous crimes, and inequalities of the Earth that we inhabit. It is not for nothing that there is Good and Evil in the world – if we never knew who and what is good, we would never be able to learn and differentiate about the bad. What I am speaking about is a precarious balance at best, but the more you understand it and use this principle, you will see how you can actively CHOOSE to become a better person.

Children and adults learn from example – when your words fail to do the trick, be the best example of yourself for other people. They will model their behaviour accordingly. Don’t believe it? Nothing could be further from the truth.

We are made in the image of what we desire. No man can serve two masters simultaneously. It is our conscious choices that define us as the people who we are and who we will become. Choose wisely.

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I once ‘Dreamed a Dream’ – to use the power of my writing in the hope of changing the world. You may consider this thought as being arrogant, lofty, self-serving and hypocritical- at best. Allow me to suggest that you take the time to read all the blogs on this site. Re-read them – it helps immensely. There are more than 150 of them and each is posted publicly for my worldwide readers. It is dedicated to this basic principle – “Better Tomorrow, a Better Future and a Better World.” It has had a positive impact on many people, and I have been blessed to see a change, within them, for the better.

However, having said that, there is only so much that I can do –it’s like taking the horse to the edge of the bubbling pond, but I cannot force it to drink its water. A lot depends upon you and your choices, your conscious decisions. We actively choose to become the people who we are – never forget that.

My writings are my legacy to the world – I sincerely hope that it is not for nothing that I care so much to do it. That’s all I can truly say.